White Collar Hero is a quest chain the begins once the player unlocks Father Sean.

Quests[edit | edit source]

Quest Requirements Time
White Collar Hero Pt. 1 Make Father Sean Be Cool on his Motorbike 12h
White Collar Hero Pt. 2 Make Father Sean Quote Contemporary Rappers in a Sermon 8h
White Collar Hero Pt. 3 Make Father Sean Play Drums in a Priest Ban 60m
White Collar Hero Pt. 4 Make Father Sean Make Catholicism Cool 4h
White Collar Hero Pt. 5 Make Father Sean Regret Meeting Homer Simpson 24h

Dialogue[edit | edit source]

White Collar Hero Pt. 1[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Homer Scared Icon.png I just backed into a parked motorcycle with my car! I gotta get out of here before its rightful Son of Anarchy shows up!
Father Sean Icon.png Excuse me? Your vehicle appears to be on my bike.
Homer Scared Icon.png Too late! The gang has me! I'll be chain-whipped to a bloody pulp!
Father Sean Icon.png Relax, friend. The only "gang" I run with meets Sunday morning at St. Thomas More church.
Homer Happy Icon.png Your motorcycle gang meets in a church? Whoa, that's pretty hard-core.
Homer Icon.png I sure am sorry about your bike. If you need to inflict gruesome street justice on me, I understand.
Father Sean Icon.png Instead why not make it up to me by attending a service? We're always looking for new members. See you Sunday!
Homer Icon.png Oh my God. I'm going to be in a motorcycle gang! This is the greatest day of my life.

White Collar Hero Pt. 2[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon.png Flanders, I've always been a good friend to you. But for your own safety, please know that I'm in a motorcycle gang now.
Ned Icon.png What truly horrible news!
Homer Icon.png It IS great, isn't it? Yeah, my gang leader is called Father Sean. Which, I don't need to tell you, is a very cool nickname.
Homer Icon.png On Sundays we throw these sick gang parties. We sing songs, and drink Sacramento wine...
Homer Icon.png And you know how bad guys in movies are always quoting from the Bible? Father Sean does that too. A ton. Because he's the most evil gang leader ever.
Homer Icon.png But he also quotes from contemporary rap songs. Kind of speaks to all us gang-types on our level, you know? He's so awesome.
Ned Icon.png Homer, I'm not entirely sure this "gang" is what you think it is.

White Collar Hero Pt. 3[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon.png Hey Flanders! Wanna hear another cool thing about my gang? The worldwide leader of the whole deal is called "the Pope."
Homer Icon.png How twisted is that? "The Pope." Just like that dude in Rome who's way nicer than the one that came before him.
Ned Worried Icon.png Homer, brace yourself. I think this "gang" you've joined is actually the C-c-c-c... oh, I can't say it. It's too horrible.
Homer Angry Icon.png Out with it, stupid Flanders!
Ned Worried Icon.png The Catholic Church! *SOBS UNCONTROLLABLY*
Homer Icon.png Church?! Father Sean, are you saving my eternal soul? How dare you!
Father Sean Icon.png Let's talk about this later, yeah? My band is about to go on stage.
Homer Angry Icon.png Your band! Stop making religion cool, Celibate Fonzie!

White Collar Hero Pt. 4[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Father Sean Icon.png I'm sorry I tricked you into coming to church, Homer.
Homer Sad Icon.png I'm just bummed out there's no motorcycle gang. Because deep down I want what every man wants...
Homer Sad Icon.png ...to belong to a doctrinaire, hierarchical organization that enforces its will through intimidation and violence.
Father Sean Icon.png But the Catholic Church did all those things and more.
Homer Angry Icon.png Sure, but then Pope Francis came along and ruined everything. With all his caring about poor people, and seeming like a decent guy. Disgusting!
Father Sean Icon.png I'll admit, it's been an adjustment for all of us.

White Collar Hero Pt. 5[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Father Sean Icon.png Homer, if I'm trying to recruit you for Catholicism, it's only because I want you to get into heaven.
Homer Icon.png What, all I need to punch my heaven ticket is to repent my sins right before I die, correct?
Father Sean Icon.png Well, uh, TECHNICALLY that's true...
Homer Thoughtful Icon.png So I can sin all I want, then, just before I croak, I say "My bad, sorry guys," and I get the same result that a genuinely good person would?
Father Sean Icon.png Uhhhhhhhhh...
Homer Happy Icon.png Loophole!
Father Sean Icon.png You're not really appreciating the spirit of the thing...
Homer Icon.png Hey, don't blame me if you guys goofed when you wrote the rules. See ya on my deathbed, dude. Not a moment before.
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