"High Command would like to be debriefed on the progress of the invasion." "The entire Rigellian army being squished into oblivion could be seen as a loss." "Luckily, I'm the king of spin. I will really have to pile on the space-cow droppings."
"Operation Earth-Over-Confident has been a rousing success. They aren't afraid of us at all!"
"SILENCE! Do not drool on me and call it precipitation!" "You have failed once again." "And you wonder why we only let you conquer planets with malls!" "You are relieved of your command. Return to Rigel VII in disgrace."
"Wait! Give me one more chance! I can take down Earth. I just need to figure out their weaknesses!"
"You mean you haven't probed them to detect their weaknesses yet? Why not?"
"Well, to be honest, it kind of weirds me out.
"I'm glad you felt comfortable enough to be honest with me."
"If I am thrown out of the Rigellian army, I will have to move back in with mother." "And she has that new young boyfriend." "He was a jerk in high school, he is a jerk now." "I suppose I could stay here." "This planet isn't so bad. There are some decent waterfalls." "And I like the direction the Human Race is going with the whole Pretzel-Hotdog thing..."