"Look, Tapped Out players! It's the Easter Bunny!"
"Actually, sir, my name is Hugs Bunny. Or rather, that's the name of the character I am portraying. I am plainly a man in a bunny suit."
"Oh. I mean, look, TSTO gang! It's a guy in a bunny suit!" "Geez, everybody. Don't be so gullible. Did you REALLY believe that was the Easter Bunny? Because I sure didn't. Not for a second." "Seriously, everybody, I think tapping on that phone all day is turning your brains to mush."
"As much fun as it is listening to you berate your loyal customers, I have work to do. You'll excuse me."
The Last Temptation of Hugs Bunny Pt. 2
"Hugs, you are truly the most gifted performer the world has ever known."
"I own a bunny suit. That is the full extent of my talents." "I've not even taken the time to develop an "act". Most four-year-olds find me woefully unprofessional."
"Let me be your agent, Hugs, and I promise you that within three years you'll be accepting the Oscar for Best Rabbit."
"There's no such thing, and even if there was, I would lose." "See, the Oscars are a popularity contest, and I am famously difficult to work with." "Because, when you get down to it, I am ashamed to be a man in a bunny suit."
"I believe in you, Hugs!"
"Well, I don't."
The Last Temptation of Hugs Bunny Pt. 3
"Another day, another mildly disappointed birthday party."
"Let me be your agent, Hugs. Don't you want to make the big bucks?"
"If I felt I deserved them, yes. But again, I am a lazy hack."
"A lazy hack who deserves to be paid more for his art. I can get you what's right and fair." "Then I will take 30%, leaving you with 70% of what's right and fair. Doesn't that sound fair?"
"Not especially, but I'm tired of arguing. Go for it."
The Last Temptation of Hugs Bunny Pt. 4
"Bad news, Hugs. Some lawyers from Disney saw an ad I took out for you. They're suing you for stealing their character."
"Hugs bunny isn't a Disney character. I invented him!"
"See, they did a movie with the Easter Bunny in it. So now they feel they own all holiday-themed rodents." "They also claim to own the rights to Santa Claus, the Boogeyman, the emotion "love," Ronald Reagan and dreams." "Oh, and in that same movie one character hugged another, so by using the name "Hugs," you're infringing on their intellectual property." "Looks like Hugs is dead. Really sorry."
The Last Temptation of Hugs Bunny Pt. 5
"Hugs Bunny, you have been found guilty of assault, disturbing the peace, and resisting arrest." "I hereby sentence you to twelve hours of community service, starting with an educational presentation at the local elementary school."
"Well, at least you're back in show business, Easter Bunny."