Make Hank Scorpio Become a Wall Street Robber Baron
4h
100 10
Hank Scorpio
The Helium-Neon Gas Laser Is Always Greener Pt. 5
Make Hank Scorpio Deliver Ultimatum to G8 Nations
60m
200 20
Hank Scorpio
Dialogue[]
The Helium-Neon Gas Laser Is Always Greener Pt. 1[]
Character
Dialogue
Sometimes I wonder if the life of an international crime lord is paying off.
How different would it have been if I'd become a teacher? Or a mailman?
Or is it mailperson now? Does it count if it isn't a male person that's the mailperson?
Another mystery to ponder and now's as good a time as any.
It'll be weeks before the contractors fix the climate control in our arctic base and we can get back to work.
Another dilemma -- Fahrenheit or Celsius? Been a Fahrenheit man all my life. Is it too late to change?
The Helium-Neon Gas Laser Is Always Greener Pt. 2[]
Character
Dialogue
Starting a legitimate business is more complicated than I thought.
All these regulations, taxes, and hidden surcharges... they scramble my brain. And not the good scramble like how 5th Street Café is actually on 3rd. I don't get it, but I don't need to.
Maybe in the dynamic world of convenient fast food I should start at the bottom and work my way up.
I wonder who I have to assassinate to get a management position?
The Helium-Neon Gas Laser Is Always Greener Pt. 3[]
Character
Dialogue
Welcome to your first day at the Kwik-E-Mart, Mister Scorpio.
It's great to be part of the Kwik-E-Mart family.
And like family you will work from eight to midnight, be responsible for cleanup, stocking, pricing, security, cleanup again, and Squishee syrup mixing. Bring your own mixing paddle.
You get one half day off every two weeks, free medical from the First-Aid kit in the back, and a full compliment of benefits.
Benefits are not complimentary. All of your salary goes to pay for them.
The Helium-Neon Gas Laser Is Always Greener Pt. 4[]
Character
Dialogue
There are so many health and safety violations here...
I've taken Jailbird's gunfire trying to protect spicy meat snacks. They're good but not bullet in the shoulder good.
I can't let it get me down. What I need is a job in a professional field.
Something that puts me in touch with real people, with real hopes and dreams!
The Helium-Neon Gas Laser Is Always Greener Pt. 5[]
Character
Dialogue
What have I done?! Wall Street is more horrifying than I could have imagined!
Such ruthlessness. Such heartless, selfish cruelty.
And that's just trying to get to the microwave in the lunch room.
I think it's time to get back to honest, productive work where I can make a real difference in the world.