The Abe-ador
Release Date
July 13, 2015
The Abe-ador is a premium limited time side questline involving the character Grampa and his Toreador Abe 's costume. It was released on July 13, 2015, during the Tap Ball 2015 Event 's Act 3.
Quests [ ]
Quest
Requirements
Time
Reward
Triggered By
The Abe-ador Pt. 1
Make Toreador Abe Steal Confessional Curtains
60m
100, 10
Grampa
The Abe-ador Pt. 2
Make Toreador Abe Taunt Springfielders
4h
100, 10
Grampa
The Abe-ador Pt. 3
Reach level 15 and Build The Frying Dutchman Make Abe Steal Swords from the Sea Captain
- 12h
100, 10
Grampa
The Abe-ador Pt. 4
Make Toreador Abe Practice Swordsmanship
24h
100, 10
Grampa
The Abe-ador Pt. 5
Make Toreador Abe Pester People in Kwik-E-Mart
8h
100, 10
Grampa
Dialogue [ ]
The Abe-ador Pt. 1 [ ]
Character
Dialogue
"Bart, did I ever tell you about the time I was a Spanish bullfighter?"
"Honestly, what's the best way to stop this story before it starts? Be straight with me, man."
"You don't believe me, is that it? Well, I'll prove it to ya! El Matador Americano Stupido is back!"
"First I'll need a red cape."
"The confessional booths in the church have those lovely red curtains. Just the color a bull loves to charge..."
The Abe-ador Pt. 2 [ ]
Character
Dialogue
"Now, the key to bullfighting is to get the bulls good and mad at ya. An angry bull makes mistakes."
"You gotta know how to insult a bull. Remember that bulls don't understand English. They speak Spanish."
"Which is why the best bullfighters are all Spaniards. Let me show you how it's done."
"Umm... Grampa, I don't know where you're going to find bulls around here."
"I don't know what you're talking about boy, they're everywhere!"
The Abe-ador Pt. 3 [ ]
Character
Dialogue
"Now, once the bull is hoppin' mad at ya, he'll charge. That's when you stick him with your sword, and wait for him to bleed to death."
"As a general rule, I approve of all violence. But even I think this sport is disturbing."
"I need to get me a sword. Isn't there a pirate that lives down by the shore?"
"The Sea Captain? He's no pirate. I think he mainly leads whale-watching daytrips. Not a happy man."
"He talks like a pirate. That whole “argh” thing."
"Yeah, and it's annoying. Funny, you don't see him around much anymore, do you?"
"It's like everybody just decided all at once they were tired of him."
"It happens. Disco Stu went that way. Sad. But, back to the mission at hand -- time to steal some swords!"
The Abe-ador Pt. 4 [ ]
Start [ ]
Character
Dialogue
"Got my sword, and I'm ready to execute some majestic animals in the slowest, most painful way possible, to the delight of everyone!"
"Hey, watch it with that sword. You're swinging it around like a maniac."
"“Maniac” is my trademark! The crowd loved me because I was just as likely to kill myself as the bull."
"Most of me is replacement limbs stitched on by Spanish surgeons after I hacked off parts of my body."
"Lotta Dr. Frankenstein-types in Spain. Wonderful country, Spain. Great food, great architecture, and great Frankensteins."
Jobs Started [ ]
Character
Dialogue
"Abe! You can't wave a sword around in public!"
"Now, if it was an AR-15 assault rifle you were brandishing, that would be fine."
"It would be especially fine if you were to carry it openly into a restaurant --"
"-- as if you were desperate for someone to challenge your Constitutional right to be a scary creep."
"Assault rifles are how we defend freedom and stop bad guys from ever committing any crimes."
"It's why crime has ceased to exist -- because everybody is armed to the teeth."
"But a SWORD???????? Swords are dangerous!"
"Aw, come on, Clancy. When he's slicing and dicing, he's not talking. And when he's not talking, my life is wonderful."
"Fine. But if he hurts anyone, YOU have to arrest him. AND do the investigating and statement-taking and all that yucky police work stuff."
"Deal!"
The Abe-ador Pt. 5 [ ]
Character
Dialogue
"Hey! Why am I waving a sword around? What's this cape around my neck?"
"You were being a bullfighter. Just like in the old days."
"I was never a bullfighter! How could I possibly have had time, when I was the world's most celebrated pesterer of convenience store shoppers?"
"Here, let me show you how it's done..."
Trivia [ ]
Gallery [ ]
Quest Map
Promotionals
Regular Quest · Premium Quest
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