Make Homer Go on a Beer Run Make Lisa Investigate Super Bowl Financials
60m
Stupor Bowl Weekend Pt. 2
Make Lisa Crunch the Numbers Make Homer Crunch Duff Warm Ranch Chips
2h
Stupor Bowl Weekend Pt. 3
Make Homer Drink Duff Beer Make Lisa Request Subpoenas of NFL Tax Documents
4h
Dialogue[]
Stupor Bowl Weekend Pt. 1[]
Start[]
Character
Dialogue
"Lisa, come in here and pray with Daddy."
"Pray? Oh no! Dad, are you dying?"
"With my lifestyle? Probably. But that's not why I'm praying. I'm praying because it's almost Sunday... Super Bowl Sunday!" "I just want the game to goo off without any lockouts, blackouts or Sum of All Fears-esque nuclear attacks."
"But all of those problems are completely avoidable or fictional. They're just created by playes, owners, and TV stations to make more money." "In fact, when you think about it, the whole Super Bowl seems about making money."
"Shut your blasphemous mouth! God loves football. How dare you question God! Now get me another beer."
"You're out of beer."
"WHY, GOD? WHY?"
End[]
Character
Dialogue
"Okay Lisa, put down those financial magazines and help me carry this stuff to the car. I got two cases of Duff and three cases of Duff Lite!"
"That's a lot of beer. Are you having a Super Bowl party?"
"Ooh, that's a good idea! Apu, get me another four cases of each." "Also, that barrel of Duff-flavored cheese blurgs and this industrial-sized tub of Duff-brand chicken swangs."
"Cheese blurgs and chicken swangs? Is that even food?
"Of course. They're made from all-natural cardboard and organic liposuction waste."
"Mmmmm... rich lady fat."
Stupor Bowl Weekend Pt. 2[]
Character
Dialogue
"This just dosen't add up - Super Bowl tickets are expensive, but don't cover team salaries." "The ads cost a fortune, but are minuscule compared to the licensing deal. And surplus revenue falls way short of operating costs."
"What are you talking about?"
"This Super Bowl is generating billions of dollars, yet somehow no one's making money from it."
"What about FOX? FOX whouldn't run something year after year if it wasn't making them money."
"So you'd think, but I'm just not seeing it. Maybe I missed something is these balance sheets."
"Awww, kids and their balance sheets."
"Now, as the consummate host, I must taste the snacks to ensure the highest quality of food for my guests."
Stupor Bowl Weekend Pt. 3[]
Character
Dialogue
"Lisa, help! The seagulls are back– they think I’m a beached whale. And they’re not the only ones…"
"Yarr, not a drip of ambergris on him."
"Dad, did you eat all the party snacks and pass out on the floor?"
"Judging me isn’t going to get rid of these gulls."
"Please Dad, I’m still busy tracking the Super Bowl profit stream from media ad sales through to player’s salaries."
"Can you re-describe that as a famous movie quote?"
"I’m following the money."
"Hmm, I haven’t seen “All The President’s Men”. I’ll have to take your word for it."
"Why don’t you get up and take a shower? It smells like the sea in here, and it’s not coming from the gulls."
"Probably because of all the salt I ate. Don’t worry — I know how to fix that."