Siren Song is a premium quest featuring Princess Kashmir.

Quests[edit | edit source]

Quest Requirements Triggered By Time
Siren Song Pt. 1 Make Princess Kashmir Answer Questions Downtown Wiggum 4h
Siren Song Pt. 2 Make Princess Kashmir Practice Kicks Wiggum 12h
Siren Song Pt. 3 Make Princess Kashmir Dance Around Town Wiggum 24h

Dialogue[edit | edit source]

Siren Song Pt. 1[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Wiggum Eyeswide Icon.png Ms. Kashmir? I'm sorry to interrupt this fan dance mid-fan, but are you an acquaintance of Freddy Quimby?
Princess Kashmir Icon.png That handsome young man with a flashy ride?
Wiggum Drunk Icon.png Freddy Quimby, ma'am, not me.
Wiggum Icon.png No? Nothing? Alright, fine.
Wiggum Icon.png Well if you wouldn't mind, we'd like to ask you some questions down at the station.
Princess Kashmir Icon.png I'm sure this drunken horde of men won't mind me stopping my exotic dance early for the sake of civil justice.
Wiggum Eyeswide Icon.png Of course they won't -- drunk young men always respect the law.
Wiggum Serious Icon.png Lou, get the riot gear and for the love of god don't let anyone get a hashtag going.

End[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Princess Kashmir Icon.png At the club, he pretended to twist his ankle and insisted I help him into Moe's.
Princess Kashmir Icon.png But I really think he just wanted a girl on his arm to impress the sad hunchback who owns the bar.
Moe Sad Icon.png I don't understand why I have to be here for this.
Wiggum Serious Icon.png And that's the last time you saw Freddy Quimby that night?
Princess Kashmir Icon.png Yes, I hope that helps.
Princess Kashmir Icon.png He and his family seem like such nice people, like American royalty. Commemorative plate stock.
Wiggum Icon.png Thank you. And now... just a few more questions.
Lou Icon.png Sir, you're questioning this girl longer than you questioned that suspected serial killer.
Wiggum Icon.png Yeah, but that guy wasn't pretty OR nice.
Wiggum Icon.png And he kept saying he was going to use my bones as a wind chime. Probably innocent anyway.

Siren Song Pt. 2[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Lou Icon.png Chief, there's a problem. I found hundreds of parking tickets in Miss Kashmir's name.
Princess Kashmir Sad Icon.png Oh, no, I must have left my car in a loading zone before the meltdown that destroyed the town.
Wiggum Drunk Icon.png Don't you worry your pretty little head, we'll talk to the judge about them.
Lou Icon.png You didn't clear any of those suspected serial killer's parking tickets.
Wiggum Icon.png Jeez Lou, didn't know you two were best friends.
Wiggum Icon.png Just try not to get any more tickets in the meantime, Ms. Kashmir.
Wiggum Icon.png And watch out -- there's a suspected serial killer on the loose.

Siren Song Pt. 3[edit | edit source]

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.