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Regrets, That's All I've Got is a side questline that was released on December 19, 2018, for the A Simpsons Christmas Special 2018 Event. It requires the character The Ghost of Christmas Past.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 1 Make the Ghost of Christmas Past Try to Win an Argument 4h Cash100
XP10
The Ghost of Christmas Past
Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 2 Make The Ghost of Christmas Past Dwell on the Past 4h Cash100
XP10
The Ghost of Christmas Past
Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 3 Make the Ghost of Christmas Past Visit Moe's 4h Cash100
XP10
The Ghost of Christmas Past
Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 4 Make the Ghost of Christmas Past Give Mr. Burns Regrets 8h Cash100
XP10
The Ghost of Christmas Past
Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 5 Make the Ghost of Christmas Past Use His Ominous Voice 12h Cash200
XP20
The Ghost of Christmas Past

Dialogue Edit

Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 1 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px Mr. Burns, you will come with me! We shall travel through your past, revealing the error of your ways!
Mr. Burns Angry Icon Is it Christmas again?
x100px It is! Despair! Oh, desp--
Mr. Burns Angry Icon Every year I tell you I have no regrets, yet you persist. Smithers! Fetch the vacuum cleaner!
x100px You have exploited the poor, trampled upon your loyal employees, and turned your back on love!
Mr. Burns Diabolical Icon I thought you were here to teach me a lesson, not rattle off a list of my proudest achievements.
x100px Uhhh...
Mr. Burns Diabolical Icon YES?
x100px Well, that’s all I’ve got, really...

All Objectives Started Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px Didn’t you once tear down an orphanage to build a for-profit retirement community?
Mr. Burns Winking Icon One group was abandoned by their parents, the other by their children. It's a wash in the end, isn't it?
x100px Come on. Open up! Everyone has regrets.
Mr. Burns Diabolical Icon Even you?
x100px Well, no. At least... I don’t think I’m allowed to talk about them...

End Edit

No dialogue.

Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px I suppose I DO regret that no one has ever asked me what I regret.
Mr. Burns Angry Icon That's weak sauce. Spill the beans! Give us something juicy, phantom!
x100px Geez... I don’t know... I’m drawing a blank here.
Mr. Burns Angry Icon Hypocrite! “Everyone has regrets”, you say. “Atone for your sins”, you whine. Practice what you preach!
x100px I’m trying. I really am. See, when you become a ghost, there’s this sort of veil that descends between you and your past, and--
Mr. Burns Angry Icon Oh, is this the part where you explain the rules of the spirit world? Well, guess what? I don’t care! No one cares!
x100px Okay, okay. Let me think, here...

End Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px I've revisited my entire existence. There's nothing I regret.
Mr. Burns Winking Icon If you have no regrets, then perhaps you’ve never really lived, eh?
x100px Whoa. Whoa, that’s heavy.
Smithers Excited Icon Hey! It's never too late to do something you'll regret.
Mr. Burns Happy Icon Rogues night out! Smithers, get the oxygen tank and the thousand dollar bills. Let's raise hell!

Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 3 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px What shall we do first? Haunt a graveyard? Try on new lengths of chain?
Mr. Burns Icon None of your undead nonsense for us. Tonight, we LIVE. Smithers, what is the worst, most disreputable place in town?

End Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px Another round?
Mr. Burns Happy Icon *hic* Smithers, what is this swill you gave me? It's utterly revolting.
Smithers Icon They call it "beer”, sir. And I think you've had enough.
Mr. Burns Happy Icon A second shot glass won’t kill me... *snore*
Smithers Sad Icon Poor, adorable Mr. Burns. Wait here, I'll bring the car around.
x100px *ominous laugh* At last, Montgomery, we are alone. Now, to my true purpose!

Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 4 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px Psst! Wake up, Montgomery! We’ve business to attend to.
x100px *hic* I like business...
x100px Of course you do. Now, I just need your signature on a few documents...
x100px First, this generous donation to an environmental charity...
x100px ...Next, this letter endorsing a Democratic candidate for office...
x100px ...And finally, on this agreement to house and care for one hundred orphans...

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Smithers Angry Icon You! What have you done to Mr. Burns?!
x100px Only given him something to regret. At long last...

Regrets, That's All I've Got Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px You said one hasn’t really lived until one has regrets. Tomorrow, Mr. Burns will feel particularly alive...
Smithers Angry Icon How could you? How could you destroy this sweet, evil man’s innocence?! I’ll get you for this!
x100px You lay one hand on me and you'll know what regrets truly are!
Smithers Angry Icon You don't scare me, you old burial shroud!
x100px Oh no? What about this?

End Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px There. I think the matter is settled. Don't you?
Smithers Surprised Icon *teeth chattering* I have stared into perdition, and it stared back... it stared back... it stared back...
x100px Tell Mr. Burns I'll be back next Christmas to remind him of what happened here tonight.
x100px Oh, and a miserable Christmas to you both. *cackles ominously*
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