Play Musty For Me is a premium side questline released on February 14, 2020 for the Black History 2020 Event. It requires the premium character Stogie.
Uh, bad news, Stogie. My latest attempt at upscalin’ this jernt has failed. I guess puttin’ monocles on the rats was a misguided attempt at class. I’m gonna have to let ya go.
That’s a shame, Moe. You paid a lot for those tiny monocles. And got so many rat bites for your troubles.
Yeah, you live and you learn I guess.
Guess I’ve gotta go out and hustle up a new gig.
Before you go, play me that favorite song o’ mine.
You got it, Moe-sephine Baker.
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*singing*…and now when there’s moonglow way up in the blue, look down at your hands, those rats are biting you…
Ah. I love that song. Was that last lyric always there?
No, I’m telling you the rats are back! Look down!
Oh God!
Play Musty For Me Pt. 2[]
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Mr. Flanders, I need a regular gig and I was wondering if the church’s weekly Bingo game could use a little zazz-a-matazz.
Well, I don’t know what that is, but it could be nice to hear some solemn, depressing hymns during the game.
Oh, I don’t really know any hymns, church cat. I’ll just groove to the vibe of the place and do my own thang.
Um, okely dokely?
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*sings* …although they say they don’t like sin / they’ll still cheat to get a win…
Mrs. Skinner hates to lose / She’s got a flask that’s full of booze.
How dare you! That’s medicinal gin!
You know, Ned, I’m thinking we don’t need a piano player for Bingo Night after all.
Amen!
Play Musty For Me Pt. 3[]
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A jazzy piano player like you could really class up the Krusty Burger! Maybe bring in some richer, more discerning fatsos.
Right on. But I need to get a feel for this place so I can bring it to my work, man. My art is always a reflection of my surroundings.
I dig it. You’ve got artistic integrity. I used to have that. Now I’m obscenely rich instead! Hahaha! *blows cigar smoke at Stogie*
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*sings* Though the food, it may be fast / Health Inspection, it won’t pass.
There’s a monkey working fries / and he’s scratching his behind…
*screech screech*
This silver-tongued crooner is right! Let’s get outta here!
Alright, Snitch Corea, get your enormous piano and scram!
Hey, that’s a pretty good reference. Did you write that joke?
No, I had Mel write me some jazz puns while you were playing.
These should count as billable hours!
Play Musty For Me Pt. 4[]
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I am not sure I need a piano player in my comic book shop. It would be like the Dark Knight doing a crossover with Huckleberry Hound.
Come on, man. This place needs a little sophistication. We both know the future of sequential art is manga and original graphic novels for the youth market.
Hm. You make a fair point. But if you want to play my “scene”, you’ll need to absorb this vast quanta of source material.
I'm on it.
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*sings* …plenty of power fantasies for boys / but when women and people of color share the toys…
…the fanboys get all steamed with rage / acting well below their age…
Though the melody is jaunty, I will not have such apt criticisms voiced in my store. Begone!
Play Musty For Me Pt. 5[]
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I’d prefer a daring harpsichordist, but I suppose a pianiste would add a certain air of dignity to this filthy atom factory.
Say no more. But before I begin to play, I need to connect with the soul of your operation so I can express it in song.
Connect away, my good man. I once had Anton LaVey come in to do the same thing.
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*sings* …He’s a misanthropic mummy, all he cares about is money…
…he’ll burn the Earth down to an ash, just to make a little cash…
Shall I release the hounds on him, sir?
What for? Never has my essence been so grandly expressed through the sultry medium of smooth jazz.
…and he’s as ugly as he’s rich/ Let’s toss him into a ditch/ And cover it with wet cement…
On second thought, get the hounds ready. But wait til the end. It is a catchy tune.