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Paramours of Christmas Past was a limited-time questline released on December 19, 2018. It was the main questline of Act 3 of the A Simpsons Christmas Special 2018 Event, progressing through it unlocked all of the event's personal prizes.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 1 Make Marge Return to Her Hometown
Collect Stockings (x100)
4h
-
Cash100
XP10
Auto
Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 2 Make Marge Try to Ignore Homer
Make Homer Try to Impress Marge
Collect Stockings (x300)
4h
4h
-
Cash100
XP10
Auto
Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 3 Build Flaming Christmas Tree (6x)
Make Marge Formulate a New Plan
Make Homer Stop, Drop, and Roll
Collect Stockings (x300)
-
8h
8h
-
Cash100
XP10
Auto
Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 4 Make Marge Hate Christmas
Make Smithers Show Marge to her Room
Collect Stockings (x300)
4h
4h
-
Cash100
XP10
Auto
Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 5 Make the Ghost of Christmas Past Dwell On the Past
Make Marge Consider Her Options
Collect Stockings (x300)
4h
8h
-
Cash100
XP10
Auto
Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 6 Make Marge Sit On Homer's Lap 12h Cash200
XP20
Auto

Dialogue Edit

Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 1 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Ned Happy Icon Marge, my beautiful fiancée! Ready to jet off to the Bahamas for a snowless, un-Christmas-y holiday?
Homer Surprised Icon Whoa, whoa, whoa. You’re marrying Flanders in this story?!
Marge Serious Icon The heroine ALWAYS starts out engaged to the wrong man. Respect the formula!
Marge Annoyed Icon Oh, how I hate Christmas, ever since I hardened my heart and took a high-powered job of some kind in the city.
Marge Sad Icon But I must return to my hometown to help my mother run the family Christmas tree farm for the next few weeks.
Ned Sad Icon Won’t you be miserable, surrounded by all that snow and Christmas cheer?
Marge Sad Icon Don’t worry. I’m sure I won’t rediscover the magic of Christmas. Or fall back in love with the man I was always meant to be with.
Ned Confused Icon Uh, who said anything about another man?

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Icon Mom, I'm home!
Homer Guilty Icon *wakes up* Marge! What a surprise to see you here!
Marge Surprised Icon Have you been sleeping on my parents’ couch since I left seven years ago?
Homer Cautious Icon No! Sometimes I cry myself to sleep in ditches and storm drains. Anyway, I work at your family’s Christmas tree farm now.
Marge Sad Icon Homer, I’m truly sorry I had to pursue my dream of being an executive in publishing, or advertising, or whatever it is.
Homer Cautious Icon But now you’ve returned to run the family business?
Marge Sad Icon No. In order to run a Christmas tree farm, you have to believe in the power of Christmas. Otherwise the accounting is impossible.
Homer Sad Icon True. You can’t manage the books without childlike innocence. That’s just business reality.

Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Annoyed Icon Mom, how could you hire my ex-fiancé to work at our family business?
Mrs. Bouvier Annoyed Icon Well, I wouldn’t have had to if YOU still held Christmas in your heart. But noooooo!
Marge Angry Icon I discovered a better world. A world of business, and misplaced priorities, and boyfriends who don’t understand the real me!
Mrs. Bouvier Annoyed Icon What do you even do? You've never bothered to tell me!
Marge Angry Icon Isn’t it enough to know that it stresses me out, and I think that makes me happy, but it’s actually killing me inside?!
Homer Cautious Icon Hi, Marge. Fancy seeing you here at the place where I work. Here, let me help you set up.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Sad Icon Homer, seeing you reminds me of when I was young and carefree and full of hope. And I don’t like that!
Marge Nervous Icon …is what I’m telling myself.
Homer Sad Icon I’ll just move some Christmas trees around, so you can notice what all this physical labor has done for my muscles.
Homer Happy Icon Hey, remember how much we used to love hanging Christmas lights?
Marge Annoyed Icon I guess a scene of us having fun together despite my reservations could be useful, story-wise...
Homer Guilty Icon *sound of trees suddenly all catching on fire* Oh. Hmm. I’m a little out of practice...

Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 3 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Homer Aah Icon I'll put the fire out! *runs into a flaming tree, catches fire, uses burning self to light a second tree on fire*
Mrs. Bouvier Annoyed Icon The family business is ruined. Marge, you’re free to return to your job in... is it fashion? Finance?
Marge Surprised Icon It’s a mix of those two, plus the music industry and something Internet-y.
Marge Icon But I’m not going to let the Christmas tree farm fail. Not when I’ve got so much experience working in a field that’s not exactly luxury retail, but similar.
Marge Thoughtful Icon Because I’m a driven, self-sacrificing, serious, no-fun kind of--
Mrs. Bouvier Annoyed Icon WE GET IT.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Happy Icon I need to research the holiday industry. I'll spend a weekend at a quaint country inn that's Christmas-themed year round!
Mrs. Bouvier Icon Is that even a real thing?
Marge Wink Icon In stories like this one, they are literally EVERYWHERE.

Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 4 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Nervous Icon *rings front desk bell* Hello? Is anyone here? I have a reservation.
Smithers Excited Icon Welcome! Fresh gingerbread cookie? Nothing reignites your lost connection to Christmas like gingerbread!
Marge Icon I’m trying to maintain my Scrooge-y humbuggery for a few more quests, thanks.
Marge Happy Icon Eventually, my heart will melt and I’ll give in to the season. But not yet!
Smithers Excited Icon That would be a TERRIFIC moment to run weeping into the arms of the true love you abandoned seven years ago...
Marge Wink Icon That’s the plan! But in the meantime, bah humbug! *chuckles*

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Sad Icon All this Christmas magic has me rethinking my life. I wish my cold, practical fiancé was here to refreeze my fast-melting heart.
Ned Happy Icon Hello, Marge!
Marge Surprised Icon My beloved Flanders! It's a Christmas miracle! *embraces him dramatically*
Ned Shocked Icon *pushes her away * “Christmas miracle”? Try to be practical and dour, won’t you?
Marge Nervous Icon I’m trying, Flanders my dear. Nothing scares me more than the prospect of rediscovering my true self and daring to love Christmas.
Ned Angry Icon I swear to you, I will NOT let that happen!
Marge Happy Icon Oh, Flanders! Thank God you’re here with me, instead of my true love!
Ned Worried Icon Uh...

Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Happy Icon Ooh, look! There are Christmas lights wound around the bedposts! Isn’t that cheery?
Ned Angry Icon No! Christmas is a silly, frivolous holiday. And if you don’t know that, then maybe we shouldn’t be together!
Ned Angry Icon Now I will wildly overreact to this -- in a way no actual person ever would -- and storm out! *storms out*
x100px Marge! It is I, the Ghost of Christmas Past! You cannot marry that man!
Homer Angry Icon Hey! What did I say about “A Christmas Carol” knockoffs! I won’t have it!
Marge Nervous Icon I couldn’t help myself! Just one Christmas ghost. Promise.
x100px I've been sent to remind you of the good times you had with Homer.
Homer Happy Icon Okay, I like the cut of this guy’s jib. Objection withdrawn.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Icon So, Mr. Ghost. I’m still waiting to hear why Homer is the man I should give my love to.
x100px Yeah, um. Let me think here...
Marge Nervous Icon Just one good reason would do it...
x100px Yeah, this is harder than I thought it’d be...
Homer Happy Icon Marge, thank goodness I found you!
Marge Surprised Icon Homer? How did you find me here?
Homer Happy Icon Let’s say I followed a star in the sky that led me to you. Let’s NOT say I hacked your email account.
Marge Happy Icon It's a Christmas miracle! We are MEANT to be together! *kisses Homer*

Paramours of Christmas Past Pt. 6 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
x100px All right Margie, I've returned from my walk ready to hear your apology.
x100px Margie! Why are you kissing that man?!
Marge Sad Icon I've decided to give my heart to someone who places a weird amount of importance on Christmas.
Marge Happy Icon Also, he’s been obsessed with me for years, which I gotta say feels pretty great.
Homer Happy Icon Come on, Marge, let's go make up for all those Christmases we missed together.

End Edit

No dialogue.

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