Million Donut Baby is a limited time side quest chain involving the character Drederick Tatum and his Boxing Drederick Tatum's new costume released on June 27, 2015, during the Tap Ball 2015 Event's Act 1.

Quests[edit | edit source]

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Million Donut Baby Pt. 1 Make Boxer Tatum Get Back Into Shape 24h Cash100
Million Donut Baby Pt. 2 Make Boxer Tatum Fumble Around with his Gloves On
Make Boxer Tatum Bond with his Pet Tiger
Make Homer Perfect his Raw Egg Recipe
1d 08h
Drederick Tatum
Million Donut Baby Pt. 3 Make Moe and Boxer Tatum Have a Boxing Match 4h Cash100
Million Donut Baby Pt. 4 Make Boxer Tatum Shadowbox 4h Cash100

Dialogue[edit | edit source]

Million Donut Baby Pt. 1[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "*sniff, sniff*"
Homer Icon.png "Former heavyweight boxing champ Drederick Tatum, are you crying?"
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "Please excuse my tears, fat person. I find myself consumed by melancholia."
Homer Icon.png "You've permanently disfigured countless young men! What do you have to be sad about?"
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "The life of a pugilist was so simple. They would put a brain in front of me, and I would concuss it posthaste. It was quite enjoyable."
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "God gave me fists that can pound living tissue to a bloody pulp, and I have spurned that holy gift."
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "Even my menagerie of rare birds and high-end giraffes can no longer fill the hole in my brain."
Homer Confused Icon.png "You mean the hole in your heart..."
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "That too."
Homer Icon.png "Well, there's only one thing to do! We've got to get you back in the ring!"

Million Donut Baby Pt. 2[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Boxing Drederick Tatum Sad Icon.png "It's not working, Coach Homer. I've lost the drive that made me a peerless psychopath. I've barely killed any sparring partners."
Homer Icon.png "We'll figure something out. Here, drink this glass full of raw eggs."
Boxing Drederick Tatum Happy Icon.png "Can we cook the eggs first? I so enjoy a perfectly shirred egg. Don't you concur?"
Homer Furious Icon.png "SHIRRED EGGS? A killing machine doesn't eat shirred eggs!"
Homer Angry Icon.png "That does it! From now on, we're doing this right! Raw eggs at every meal!"
Homer Angry Icon.png "You'll wear those boxing gloves day and night, until you remember how to use them!"
Homer Angry Icon.png "And you'll spend every night sleeping next to your pet tiger, relearning what it means to be a killer!"
Boxing Drederick Tatum Icon.png "Cohabitating with a tiger would seem to be a dangerous notion."
Homer Icon.png "Yeah, well a boxer is nothing without “the eye of the tiger.” Or would you question the wisdom of Frank Stallone?"

Million Donut Baby Pt. 3[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon.png "Drederick, I've been a fool. Obviously, I'm a world-class boxing trainer. No one doubts that."
Homer Icon.png "But if the “Rocky” movies taught us anything, it's that no boxer can win without a Burgess Meredith-type in his corner."
Homer Icon.png "We've got to find a cantankerous, gravel-voiced, wrinkly weirdo to complete your entourage."
Moe Icon.png "HELLO!"
Homer Happy Icon.png "Moe! You're perfect!"
Boxing Drederick Tatum Annoyed Icon.png "I remain sceptical of this gentleman's credentials."
Moe Angry Icon.png "Listen here, you lily-livered, sorry excuse for a boxer. I've been in the fight game since your Daddy was gettin' beat up by the milkmaid!"
Homer Surprised Icon.png "Whoa. Moe, is that true?"
Moe Icon.png "Nah, not really. Just caught up in the--"
Boxing Drederick Tatum Annoyed Icon.png "Coach Homer, the words of this man are making me quite upset. May I hit him, please?"
Moe Worried Icon.png "Now wait a second--"
Homer Icon.png "That's the Drederick Tatum I've been waiting to see! Finally, SOMETHING that makes you angry."
Homer Icon.png "Let's get you and Moe in the ring right away!"
Moe Worried Icon.png "Hold on, hold on. Moe's not fightin' nobody..."

Million Donut Baby Pt. 4[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Homer Happy Icon.png "You're back on top again Drederick!"
Homer Icon.png "I hope to see you playing Tap Ball, we could use your skills on the court-field-greens-pitch."
Boxing Drederick Tatum Happy Icon.png "Do the rules of Tap Ball allow for the pummelling of your fellow man's stupid face?"
Homer Serious Icon.png "I'm sorry, but the rules are very clear: you can only punch people who aren't me."
Homer Icon.png "Oh, and Lisa. No hitting my daughter."
Boxing Drederick Tatum Happy Icon.png "Not to worry. I am the one and only boxer on the face of the earth who restricts his violence to men."

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • The quest title is a parody of a boxing film called Million Dollar Baby.

Gallery[edit | edit source]

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