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Milhouse FTW! was a limited time questline released during the The Yellow Badge of Cowardge Promotional. Progressing through it unlocks FitTM Milhouse.

Quests[]

Quest Requirements Triggered By Time
Milhouse FTW! Pt. 1 Make Milhouse Research Fitness on the Internet Milhouse 6h
Milhouse FTW! Pt. 2 Make Milhouse Order Unnecessary Fitness Gadgets Homer 4h
Milhouse FTW! Pt. 3 Make FitTM Milhouse Guzzle Sports Drinks FitTM Milhouse 12h
Milhouse FTW! Pt. 4 Make FitTM Milhouse Work it! FitTM Milhouse 24h

Dialogue[]

Milhouse FTW! Pt. 1[]

Character Dialogue
Milhouse Sad Icon *Sigh*
Homer Happy Icon "Hey, it's what's-his-name... Glasses McBluehair?"
Milhouse Sad Icon "No, Mr. Simpson. My name is--"
Homer Sarcastic Icon "Wait, don't tell me! I totally know you -- you're Lisa's boyfriend, or girlfriend, or something. Uhhh... Martin?"
Milhouse Sad Icon "No, close though."
Homer Thoughtful Icon "Okay, think, Homer. Not Nelson, because he's cool. God, I wish I was Nelson. Okay gotta focus... close to Martin... Comic Book Guy?"
Milhouse Sad Icon "That's not a good guess at all."
Homer Icon "Principal Skinner? Duffman? Lard Lad? The Kwik-E-Mart?"
Milhouse Sad Icon "My last name is Van Houten."
Homer Confused Icon ...
Homer Serious Icon "Are you sure I know you?"
Milhouse Sad Icon *Sigh*
Lenny Icon "Hey Homer! Whatcha doin'?"
Homer Happy Icon "Just messing with Milhouse to cheer him up. He seemed kind of down."
Carl Icon "Sorry to hear that. What's up, kid? Did future Lisa future divorce future you again?"
Milhouse Sad Icon "No, field day is coming up at school and I've already got a closet full of last-place trophies in one of those. I don't know what to do."
Lenny Icon "You could rent a storage unit!"
Carl Icon "Yeah, I bet you could fit a crapload of last-plcace trophies in one of those."
Lenny Icon "It's fun solving people's problems!"
Homer Serious Icon "I think Milhouse actually wants to NOT lose."
Lenny Sad Icon "Oh, like win? That's super-hard."
Carl Icon "I'd seriously give the storage unit some thought."
Homer Happy Icon "Come on, guys - let's help him win!"
Milhouse Sad Icon "Do you guys actually now anything about fitness?"
Homer Thoughtful Icon "I know "feel the burn" is a thing. And there's something called cardio, which is either good or bad. Also electrolytes, maybe?"
Carl Icon "Listen to Professor Jack Lalanne over here!"
Milhouse Sad Icon "Maybe I should just look up fitness on the internet."
Lenny Icon "The inter-what-now?"
Milhouse Icon "The internet. It's where I learned about the civil war, dinosaurs, my parent's divorce, my parents getting back together..."
Milhouse Sad Icon "...the tidal wave approaching Springfield, the assassination of Trotsky---"
Homer Surprised Icon "They assassinated Trotsky?!"
Lenny Surprised Icon "There were dinosaurs?!"
Milhouse Icon "I'm gonna go do an internet search for "rock-hard male bodies.""
Lenny Icon "Just make sure safe search is one with that one."

Milhouse FTW! Pt. 2[]

Start[]

Character Dialogue
Homer Thoughtful Icon "I think we were really close to helping Morton."
Carl Icon "Totally! You should have kept saying science words."
Homer Sad Icon "I kind of ran out."
Comic Book Guy Icon "Hello, did I hear my name?"
Homer Annoyed Icon "Yeah, like a million lines ago. It’s nothing, it was a joke."
Homer Happy Icon "Hey, here’s Milhouse now. How did the web surfing go?"
Milhouse Icon "Pretty good. The internet is a weird place, but it sure has products to buy. Can I borrow your credit card, Mr. Simpson?"
Homer Icon "I don’t see why not. Knock yourself out."
Milhouse Sad Icon "This card says "Todd Flanders."
Homer Annoyed Icon "Well I’m not gonna give you my “Ned Flanders” card! You’re just not ready for that flexible spending limit."

End[]

Character Dialogue
Milhouse Icon "Alright! My stuff is here already. Physical fitness, here I come!"
You’ll find the Fit™ Milhouse outfit in your inventory!
 
— In Game Message


Milhouse FTW! Pt. 3[]

Character Dialogue
Fit Milhouse Icon "This outfit is great! It’s like I got a little fitter just putting it on!"
"Now for those important part of getting in shape… choosing a sports drink."
Sea Captain Icon "YARR! How about a salty treat from the deep to quench that thirst? Allow me to introduce…"
Sea Captain Aghast Icon "Captain McCallister’s very own Obesotade!"
Fit Milhouse Icon "Who’s Captain McAllister"
Sea Captain Icon "That’s me. Sea Captain, Captain McAllister. Same thing. Same guy."
Fit Milhouse Icon "I’ve never heard anyone call you Captain McAllister."
Sea Captain Icon "You’re not making this into something it’s not. My last name is McAllister — Captain McAllister, who is a sea captain."
"I sell a product. It’s effective. You should buy some."
Fit Milhouse Icon "Okay, tell me more, Mister McAllister"
Sea Captain Icon "Not Mister, Captain. Mine is the only brine-based sports drink scientifically guaranteed to make you lose weight be peeing out more water than you take in."
Fit Milhouse Icon "Even as a naive ten-year old, I question that as a fitness strategy."
Sea Captain Icon "And how many whales have you killed?"
Fit Milhouse Icon "Two."
Sea Captain Aghast Icon "Shiver me timbers, that’s two more than me."
Sea Captain Icon "Listen my lad, the only question you need to ask yourself is which color you’d prefer. Will it be goat-urine yellow or rigor-mortis blue?"
Fit Milhouse Icon "If you promise to go away afterwards, I’ll take a gallon of both. And here’s my credit card."
Sea Captain Icon "Ah yes, Todd Flanders. I sold a barrel of grog to your father Ned just yesterday."
"He’s fatter and balder than I remember, but aren't we all."

Milhouse FTW! Pt. 4[]

Start[]

Character Dialogue
Fit Milhouse Icon "Now that I’ve bought a bunch of stuff on the internet, guzzled copious amount of sugary sea water…"
Milhouse Sad Icon "…and been to the hospital for acute kidney failure, I guess I’d better get exercising."

During the Task[]

Character Dialogue
Fit Milhouse Icon "Feel the burn Milhouse! Feel the burn!!"
Milhouse is getting in shape. Just like tapping through all the dialogue in this update got your finger in shape.
 
— In Game Message


End[]

Can Milhouse actually pull this ‘fitness’ thing off? Find out on this Sunday’s episode of The Simpsons, 8/7 on FOX!
 
— In Game Message
Character Dialogue
Lugash Icon "Lugash see chubby American boy making silly moves in outdated exercising clothes!"
Milhouse Sad Icon "Look who’s taking! You smoke, you drink a bottle of vodka a day…"
"…you've never seen a vegetable, and your heart is mostly translated pig valves."
Lugash Icon "How you know these things?"
Milhouse Sad Icon "They’re written on your brochure and you have them tattooed on your back."
Lugash Sad Icon "That was crazy night. Never drink and redo brochure."
Lugash Icon "When you are ready to stop silly girl moves and become best, come to gym."
Fit Milhouse Icon *Gasp* "You mean you’re offering to be my own personal trainer?"
Lugash Icon "Yes, but for a price. Lugash is premium!"
Is Milhouse tough enough to handle Lugash’s training regime? Complete Lugash’s “The Cranky Man Can” storyline to find out!
 
— In Game Message
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