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Knit Fits is a premium side questline that was released on December 5, 2018, for the A Simpsons Christmas Special 2018 Event. It requires the premium character Kathy from Personnel.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Knit Fits Pt. 1 Make Kathy Politely Ignore Smithers
Make Smithers Glare at Kathy
4h
4h
Cash100
XP10
Kathy from Personnel
Knit Fits Pt. 2 Make Kathy Demonstrate Knitting Technique
Make Krusty Tie His Yarn in Knots
4h
4h
Cash100
XP10
Kathy from Personnel
Knit Fits Pt. 3 Make Kathy Take a Tea Break 8h Cash100
XP10
Kathy from Personnel
Knit Fits Pt. 4 Make Kathy Pitch a Knit Fit 24h Cash100
XP10
Kathy from Personnel
Knit Fits Pt. 5 Make Kathy Passionately Embrace Smithers
Make Smithers Be Swept Away in the Moment
8h
8h
Cash200
XP20
Kathy from Personnel

Dialogue Edit

Knit Fits Pt. 1 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Smithers Icon Hello, I’m here for the introductory knitting class?
Kathy from Personnel Happy Icon Please come in. I’ll be your instructor. My name is---
Smithers Surprised Icon Kathy from Personnel!
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Waylon Smithers. This here yarn store isn’t big enough for the two of us.
Smithers Annoyed Icon You don’t scare me, yarnslinger. I came here for one reason -- to make ugly scarves no one wants as slowly as possible. And I reckon to.
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon You’ll be begging for mercy before the first purl stitch.
Smithers Annoyed Icon We’ll just see about that. Icy silence, then?
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Icy silence it is.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Krusty Happy Icon Hey, hey! Let’s knit, ladies!
Helen Lovejoy Yay Icon Krusty the Clown?! You’re a needle jockey?
Krusty Embarrassed Icon Nah. I heard the hipsters were into knitting, so I figured: there’s my next desperate attempt to stay relevant.
Krusty Confused Icon Hey, what’s with the weird tension in the room?
Helen Lovejoy Icon Those two hate each other. It happens whenever a brash young thread-man saunters into town. There’s bound to be a knit-down.
Krusty Happy Icon You just can’t avoid crazy in this town, can you?

Knit Fits Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Kathy from Personnel Icon And knit, and purl, and knit, and purl. Very good, Krusty!
Krusty Confused Icon What are you seeing that I’m not, lady? I just sewed my arm to a tea cozy.
Kathy from Personnel Happy Icon Now, now. You’re making progress. Which is more than I can say for poor Waylon.
Smithers Angry Icon I’m... not... giving up! Knit! Purl! Aaaugh!
Kathy from Personnel Happy Icon Is that a warp, or a weft? I honestly can’t tell!
Smithers Annoyed Icon Those are parallel wales and courses, and you know it, you old bag!
Kathy from Personnel Icon My, my, Krusty. It appears Mr. Smithers is losing his patience, doesn’t it?
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Any time you want to turn tail, Waylon, there’s the door.
Krusty Confused Icon I am INSANELY attracted to you right now. That says something awful about my mental health, doesn’t it?

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Kathy from Personnel Icon Very good, students. With the exception of Mr. Smithers, I see a room full of budding mittenists and sweateristos.
Smithers Excited Icon Really, old timer? Because I just smocked a slip-stitch and half-clustered an entire row of Fair-Isle.
Kathy from Personnel Surprised Icon *biggest gasp ever*
Helen Lovejoy Scream Icon That’s... that’s impossible! I’ve never seen such raw talent!
Krusty Confused Icon I don’t understand a word, yet I can’t tear my eyes off you glorious freaks!

Knit Fits Pt. 3 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Mr. Smithers! This lesson is for beginners only. I know a seasoned garter-stitcher when I see one.
Smithers Icon Sorry to disappoint you, but I’ve never clacked needles before today. It looks like human resources isn’t the only field in which you’re second-rate.
Helen Lovejoy Yay Icon Oh, the enmity! It’s manna from heaven for my damaged soul!
Krusty Angry Icon Hey crazies -- stop turning me on this instant! You’re all so bats, I don’t know who to fall in love with first!
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon I’m going to step outside for a tea break. When I come back, Waylon, we will settle this the old-fashioned way. Cable knit sweaters at twenty paces.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon I challenge you to a duel, Mr. Smithers!
Smithers Angry Icon Challenge accepted. Choose... your... pattern.
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Cable-knit crew necks. Size: extra-large.
Helen Lovejoy Angsty Icon Extra-large?! That’s too much! They can’t possibly survive!
Smithers Angry Icon Very well. What color?
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Gray.
Helen Lovejoy Boo Icon No! There’s not enough contrast! They’ll die for sure! Heavens! *faints*

Knit Fits Pt. 4 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Having trouble attaching your sleeves, Waylon? Looks like you cast off a little early? Or did you drop a half-slip on your basketweave cast on?
Smithers Angry Icon Are you blind? I’m pulling left into a quarter-cluster on a mock-smocking stockinette Bainsley tiedown re-cross.
Kathy from Personnel Surprised Icon But... that’s impossible!
Krusty Cautious Icon Anyone have the slightest clue who’s winning?
Helen Lovejoy Yay Icon They're knitting at a level I’ve only seen in the movies!
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon I will not lose to this man! Eat my Farnsworth Reverse Studsley purl hitch-pull weekender moss-loop!
Krusty Surprised Icon SHE IS A GOLDEN GOD!!!!

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Helen Lovejoy Angsty Icon I... I don’t believe it. Two perfect sweaters, in under five minutes.
Krusty Scared Icon I think they’re dead. They gave their lives for clothing no one will ever wear. Because they’re homemade. And who wants that?
Helen Lovejoy Yay Icon Wait... I’m getting a pulse. Somehow, they’re both alive!

Knit Fits Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Kathy from Personnel Sad Icon We could have died, Waylon. Is our rivalry really worth that?
Smithers Sad Icon Logically, no. But a body needs a workplace enemy. For better or for worse, you’re mine.
Kathy from Personnel Surprised Icon My god, you’re right. If I didn’t have you to loathe, I wouldn’t be so close with all my other coworkers. I suppose I should thank you.
Smithers Surprised Icon And I you.
Kathy from Personnel Icon *stares meaningfully into his eyes*
Smithers Angry Icon *returns her gaze with manly directness*

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Smithers Surprised Icon What the hell just happened?
Kathy from Personnel Surprised Icon I... don’t know. I have to tell you, I’m gay.
Smithers Surprised Icon Me too. And proud of it.
Kathy from Personnel Surprised Icon I guess when two people really, truly despise one another, the attraction is irresistible.
Smithers Angry Icon That makes zero sense. Dumbest thing I ever heard.
Kathy from Personnel Annoyed Icon Go to hell, Smithers.


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