I Am the One Who Crocks is a premium side questline released on June 02, 2016 during the Homer's Chiliad 2016 Event. It requires placing the Five Alarm Chili decoration and unlocking Devil Flanders.

Quests[edit | edit source]

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 1 Make Devil Flanders Add to Homer's Chili 3h Cash100
Experience10
Ned
I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 2 Make Devil Flanders Conjure Up Hellfire Peppers 3h Cash100
Experience10
Ned
I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 3 Make Ned Go For an Exorcism 3h Cash100
Experience10
Ned
I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 4 Make Ned Spend the Day in Jail 8h Cash100
Experience10
Rev. Lovejoy

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • The quest title is a parody of a famous line from the American TV show, Breaking Bad
    • It also refers to the Crockpot, a slow cooking kitchen appliance commonly used to make chili.
  • In Pt. 2, Ned says he would never wink, even though he winks in the episode "Hurricane Neddy".

Dialogue[edit | edit source]

I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 1[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Ned Icon.png Chili seems to bring out the worst in people. That's why Jesus only turned water into grape juice, according to my Hays Morality Code Bible.
Devil Flanders Icon.png When it comes to heat, these chili-chumps don't know a jalapeno from a hallelujah!
Devil Flanders Icon.png We should show them the error of their ways. Make a chili so spicy that they'll get baptized just for the water.
Ned Worried Icon.png Oh, I don't think so. Spicy foods are a highway to sins like pride, envy, and sin listing. Oh no!

I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 2[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Ned Sad Icon.png I'm so tired. It feels like I didn't sleep a wink last night. Not that I would ever wink – that's a Jezebel's blink.
Ned Shocked Icon.png Where did all these cooking supplies come from? Was I sleepwalking? Did I even make sure to sleep-stretch and sleep-hydrate?
Devil Flanders Icon.png Let's just say you were asleep at the wheel, so I took over. And I didn't use my turn signals!
Ned Sad Icon.png Now, Neddy, don't get yourself in a tiz-tiddilly-izzy over nothing. The Devil doesn't live in your head.
Ned Icon.png He lives in San Francisco.

I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 3[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Ned Shocked Icon.png Another restless night and more spicy evidence! And now I'm quoting Jimmy Buffett songs!
Ned Worried Icon.png I'm worried the Devil might be corrupting my evening activities. Last night, I watched three hours of the Ken Burns jazz documentary – that's almost a third of it!
Ned Icon.png I'd better push up the weekly exorcism!

I Am the One Who Crocks Pt. 4[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Rev. Lovejoy Icon.png Ned, I can assure you these “visions” you've been having aren't biblical in nature. And I should know, I've read almost all of that book.
Rev. Lovejoy Annoyed Icon.png Isn't your neighbor Homer experimenting with hallucination-inducing Insanity Peppers?
Ned Shocked Icon.png You mean Homer might have given me a hallucinogenic substance? I need to make a citizen's arrest!
Rev. Lovejoy Icon.png Now, Ned, Homer might be an idiot but the Bible says “love thy neighbor as your" something. I haven't gotten to the end of that one yet – don't spoil it for me.
Ned Sad Icon.png I'm not citizen's arresting Homer -- I'm arresting me!
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.