How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas is a quest that unlocks once the player gets The Grumple. This quest is described by the game as a heart-warming, rhyming children's story about the murderous Grumple.


Quest Requirements Time
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 1 Make The Grumple Find a House 12h
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 2 Make the Grumple Move into the Brown House 4h
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 3 Make the Grumple Try to Sleep 8h
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 4 Make the Grumple Play his Grump-Drum 24h
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 5 Make the Grumple Lose His Mind 12h
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 6 Make the Grumple Prepare Grumple-ty Stew 8h
How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 7 Make the Grumple Die Cursing the Simpsons 12h


How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 1Edit

Character Dialogue
Bookicon Far north of North Portland, just past Mount Mahorn
You'll find the brown shack where the Grumple was born
He lived all his days in that brown domicile
Just drumming his Grump-drum and smiling his smile
Till one day his neighbors, each wearing a frown
Cried "monster!" and "kill it!" and burned the place down
The Grumple was frightened but quick to forgive
He knew he'd find somewhere a Grumple could live
He traveled by night, always hiding in shadow
And searched all through Georgia and then Colorado
Till seeing Fair Springfield, where once was a dome,
He giggled and jiggled and knew he was home
The Grumple Icon

"I'll find a nice house, where a Grumple can drum,
Why there's dozens of blue ones to generate income!"
And so off he set, with a "Grumplety-Groo!
I've excellent credit and references too!"

How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 2Edit

Character Dialogue
Bookicon The Grumple, determined, searched high and searched low,
He wanted a floor plan with really good flow
And found just the place! In the center of town
Was a home that was pleasant and best of all…BROWN!

How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 3Edit

Character Dialogue
Bookicon He bought chairs and tables, though Grumples aren’t rich
(and strangely are fond of mid-century kitsch)
He painted and sanded, real manual labors
And prayed that he wouldn't get killed by his neighbors
And lo and behold! the neighbors were nice!
Excepting, perhaps, the ones just to his right.
It’s not that the Simpsons were awful unfriendly
It’s just that they argued and yelled never-endly
A Grumple needs plenty of shut-eye each night
But Simpson-y screaming made Grumple uptight

How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 4Edit

Character Dialogue

Would Simpsons be quiet, if Grumple asked nicely?
He begged them all once-ly, then pled with them twice-ly
But still, on they bellowed their bellow-ous roaring
And if they were sleeping, the fat one was snoring
If only the Simpsons had realized their danger
They might have respected this furry green stranger
And Grumple, that fun-loving, peaceable sort
He tried to find some way to be a good sport
To quiet the rage to which he was succumbing
The Grumple tried drumming, and drumming, and drumming

How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 5Edit

Character Dialogue
Bookicon A well-rested Grumple is happy-go-lucky
A sleep-deprived Grumple? There's no one more sucky
The Grumple fought daily with murderous urges,
And dreams of dead Simpsons would flood him in surges
But maybe -- just maybe! -- all would have been well
Had Homer not done the next thing I will tell
Not paying attention while driving is dumb,
And Homer's car, backing, crushed Grumple's Grump-drum
This drum Grumple's father had made for his son
Ere he died in the Great Grumple War of Aught-One
The drum went cuh-runch! And then Homer yelled "crap!"
And something inside of the Grumple went snap!
Down deep in his psyche a switch went flip-flop,
And poor Grumple's sanity burst with a pop!

How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 6 Edit

Character Dialogue
Bookicon He waited till nighttime was darker than ink
Then into the Simpsons house Grumple did slink
He snatched all the Simpsons with razor sharp claws
And just before shoving Bart into his jaws
The Grumple Icon Thought: "No! I'd much rather watch them die slow
And give them all reason to holler out 'D'oh!'"
"I'll bind them with tyings, this noise-ulous crew
And boil them slow-like, make Grumplety-stew!"

How Mr. Simpson Stole Christmas Pt. 7Edit


Character Dialogue
Bookicon If Grumple had bothered to tie up the baby,
He’d still be alive today, Grump-drumming, maybe
But Maggie was, after all, Mr. Burns’ shooter,
If you don’t believe me, go ask your computer
The Grumple, he never had any idea
That of all the Simpsons (who’re drawn in Korea)
The deadliest, shootin’-est one of them all
Was Maggie, who shot his brains onto the wall
The Grumple Icon The Grumple’s last thought as life he did lose,
Was “Grumple you, Simpsons! You Grumplety Groos!”


Character Dialogue
Bookicon The Grumple has perished? You bought him with donuts!
(We’ll reanimate him, so you guys don’t go nuts.)
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