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Country on the Inside is a premium questline which was released with the Level 48 update. It started once the player had purchased the Beer-N-Brawl.

QuestsEdit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Country on the Inside Pt. 1 Place Barbecue Pit
Make Lurleen Barbecue Some Roadkill
24h Cash100
XP10
Lurleen
Country on the Inside Pt. 2 Make Lurleen Perform a Gig
Make Springfielders Drink at Beer -N-Brawl
12h
6h
Cash100
XP10
Homer
Country on the Inside Pt. 3 Make Marge Write a Smear Article 24h Cash100
XP10
Marge
Country on the Inside Pt. 4 Make Moe do a Slanderous Documentary on Lurleen
Make Marge Do a Load of Laundry
1d12h Cash100
XP10
Marge
Country on the Inside Pt. 5 Make Lurleen Play Country Guitar 12h Cash100
XP10
Lurleen

Dialogue Edit

Country on the Inside, Pt. 1 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Lurleen Sad Icon "There was a time when singing at the Beer-N-Brawl was the highlight of my day."
Lurleen Sad Icon "Now I'm just hoping one of those beer bottles being thrown at my head will knock me out of this funk."
Cletus Shocked Icon "Less talkin', more singin'!"
Lurleen Sad Icon "I'm too depressed to sing the blues. If only there was an even sadder way to express myself."
Homer Icon "How about poetry?"
Homer Icon "Those guys seem pretty depressed. Probably from their lack of job prospects and general public disrespect."
Lurleen Sad Icon "Nah, Jewel has said all there needs to be said in verse."
Lurleen Icon "Hey, what about grunge music? It makes you frown just by saying it."
Lurleen Sad Icon "Grunge. Grunge. Makes me feel like an unclean toilet."
Homer Thoughtful Icon "I guess the nineties are having a comeback."
Homer Icon "Plus you can keep wearing all your plaid shirts from your country days."
Lurleen Happy Icon "Then it's settled. I'm starting a grunge band. But first I need to find some band mates."
Cletus Icon "How you fixin' to do that?"
Lurleen Happy Icon "Simple – Craigslist."
Lurleen Icon "I'll post an ad for a barbecue pit, buy it, throw a barbecue, and hope some potential band mates show up."
Lurleen Happy Icon "It's fool proof!"

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Homer Eating Icon "Boy, Lurleen. This is some of the best grilled mystery meat I've ever had."
Homer Icon "And I buy my meat from the Kwik-E-Mart."
Apu Icon "Our meat is 100% accounted for, 90% of the time."
Lurleen Icon "Homer, it's so good to see you. With this new band starting up, it would be great to have a manager again."
Homer Sarcastic Icon "I DO have experience in both the fields of band management and grunge music."
Lurleen Happy Icon "Wow! You are as qualified as you are handsome."
Lurleen Icon "Are you sure Marge will be OK with it?"
Homer Sarcastic Icon "Of COURSE she'll be OK with it."
Homer Icon "Long hours on the road, tearful soulful music driving us together... what could she possibly complain about?"
Marge Angry Icon "Grrrrr..."
Smithers Icon "I'd love to play percussion in your ensemble, as long as it doesn't interfere with my job. I work 9am to 9am."
Willie Happy Icon "Room for one more? I've always had a wee soft spot for grunge."
Willie Icon "Willie ain't an open book."
Homer Happy Icon "Sounds like you've got yourself a band! I'm so happy!"
Homer Confused Icon "But you're also out of potato salad, so I don't really know how to feel."

Country on the Inside, Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "Grunge band? Check."
Homer Sarcastic Icon "Ace manager? Check."
Homer Dreamy Icon "Sexy lead singer? Check."
Homer Happy Icon "Franz Kafka's nationality? Czech!"
Lurleen Icon "So what do we do now, Homer?"
Homer Happy Icon "First order of business – free beer at the Beer-N-Brawl!"
Lurleen Icon "And the band will play?"
Homer Guilty Icon "Oh, right. You should probably play a show as well. I'm sure we can squeeze you in somewhere."

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Homer Happy Icon "Great news – I've brought your band into the twenty first century!"
Lurleen Icon "With what? A social media campaign? ViewTube videos? Viral marketing?"
Homer Icon "Even better. I strapped a megaphone to the roof of my car."
Homer Furious Icon "Listen up! Everyone get to the Beer-N-Brawl for free beer!"
Lurleen Icon "Uh, and to listen to my new grunge band: Forever Alone!"
Homer Serious Icon "Please don't interrupt me when I'm megaphoning."
Homer Furious Icon "Free beer!"

Country on the Inside, Pt. 3 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Sad Icon "Homer, I don't want to seem like the jealous wife –"
Marge Angry Icon "But please stop spending time with women other than me."
Homer Confused Icon "Is this about Princess Kashmir and her proposed blimp trip?"
Marge Surprised Icon "What? No!"
Homer Guilty Icon "Well then forget I said that."
Homer Icon "Also, on an unrelated note, do you have any spare helium or hydrogen?"
Marge Angry Icon "It's about Lurleen – I don't want you hanging around with that trollop."
Homer Guilty Icon "Marge, there's nothing to be afraid of."
Homer Sarcastic Icon "It's just me, music, women, money, endless booze, and a live-like-there's-no-tomorrow attitude."
Marge Angry Icon "If you won't listen to reason, I'll have to confront Lurleen directly…by writing an anonymous article that attacks her character."
Homer Icon "Mention that there's free beer at the Beer-N-Brawl."

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Lurleen Angry Icon "This article in Smear magazine says my songs were stolen from Sadgasm!"
Homer Happy Icon "Hey, that's my old band!"
Homer Icon "I didn't know anyone still remembered us."
Homer Thoughtful Icon "No one did on the VH1 special "Try Not To Remember The 1990's"."
Brockman Icon "This is Kent Brockman ambushing you live from a bush. How does it feel to be a fraud?"
Lurleen Angry Icon "We're not frauds! We didn't steal ANY songs!"
Homer Thoughtful Icon "I dunno, that's not what this article quotes me as saying..."
Brockman Icon "Please don't fight without the cameras rolling, otherwise we're just going to make you do it again."
Lurleen Angry Icon "We're not fighting! I didn't do anything wrong."
Brockman Icon "That's what they all say. But then we edit, edit, edit and bingo: guilty confession!"

Country on the Inside, Pt. 4 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Surprised Icon "That article was supposed to make Lurleen LESS popular."
Marge Sad Icon "Now the press is all over her and there's talk of a Sadgasm reunion tour."
Marge Sad Icon "I need a stiff drink! One cranberry juice please."
Marge Sad Icon "Homer can't wear flannel nowadays! Whenever he lies down, ants attack him thinking he's a picnic blanket."
Moe Icon "Could also be the bits of sandwich he's always got stuck to his cheeks."
Moe Sad Icon "God I miss Homer."
Moe Worried Icon "Without those sandwich bits, the rats have started to go after the smaller customers."
Moe Worried Icon "I lost three kids with fake IDs that way."
Marge Sad Icon "Well, if the printed page didn't destroy her career, what will?"
Moe Icon "You're thinking too small! We need to make a slanderous documentary that exposes all of Lurleen Lumpkins's dark secrets."
Moe Icon "I've been going through her trash so I know a few of them already."
Marge Surprised Icon "But we just came up with this idea now! How did you know to start going through her trash?"
Moe Sad Icon "Look, do you want Lurleen's dark secrets or not?"
Marge Angry Icon "I want them. I want them strewn all over town like dirty laundry."
Marge Sad Icon "Which reminds me I've got a flannel shirt covered in ants I have to wash."

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Homer Scared Icon "Wow. I had no idea you had such a dark and twisted past, Lurleen!"
Lurleen Sad Icon "I do not! That movie was full of lies and slander!"
Lurleen Sad Icon "It's like Hollywood doesn't have any respect for the truth!"
Cletus Angry Icon "You take that back about Hollywood. My cousin was the pig from Babe."
Lurleen Angry Icon "Homer, that bit about my previous managers all dying of mysterious causes was completely false."
Lurleen Sad Icon "I just marry them and then they leave me."
Lurleen Sad Icon "By way of coffin."
Lurleen Sad Icon "You have to believe me."
Homer Thoughtful Icon "I don't know. That movie might not have had facts, or accurate sources, or evidence, but it did have a CG robot!"

Country on the Inside, Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Lurleen Sad Icon "This grunge business isn't getting me out of my depression like I thought it would."
Lurleen Sad Icon "Apparently being sad all the time doesn't make you happy."
Lurleen Sad Icon "I miss the country lifestyle – the cowboy boots hiding switch blades, the big trucks, the starry skies, the women with large hairdos hiding switchblades."
Homer Sad Icon "But you're a grunge natural!"
Homer Icon "It's like every crowd's energy is lower than the last."
Lurleen Sad Icon "I can't live like this."
Lurleen Sad Icon "I need open air, belt buckles in the shape of states, and jello being counted as a salad."
Lurleen Icon "I'm going back to singing country songs all alone."
Homer Scared Icon "Does that mean no more free beer at the Beer -N- Brawl...?"
Homer Serious Icon "I quit!"

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Marge Sad Icon "I'm sorry Lurleen. I realize now that I was just being a jealous housewife."
Marge Sad Icon "I spread all those lies so that you'd fall from grace."
Lurleen Sad Icon "Oh, your jealousy was very much justified. I made several passes at Homer, but he didn't understand a single one of them."
Homer Thoughtful Icon "She kept wanting me to go back to her hotel room, but why eat out of a mini-fridge when you can eat out of a normal fridge?"
Lurleen Sad Icon "I guess I lost a man I never had, and a career I never fully understood. I also lost thirty-five cents the other day."
Marge Icon "Lurleen, that's the makings of a great country song!"
Lurleen Sad Icon "About the thirty-five cents? I know."
Marge Icon "Well, is there anything we can do to help?"
Lurleen Happy Icon "Buy my CD?"
Marge Sad Icon "Ummm… no."
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