I gave the Try-N-Save the best years of my life. Stopped a hundred shoplifters from committing heinous, grisly misdemeanors.
All to wind up here. Taking the only job I could find -- night guard at an anchor store.
Sure, it’s the best anchor store in town. Hankerin’ for Anchorin’ and Anchor Notions just can’t compete.
Still, it somehow feels like a step down.
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Good morning, sir! How was the night shift?
‘Bout 3AM, a bird landed on the big anchor. I grabbed it for questioning, but it played dumb. I let it go with a warning.
Great Scott! The big anchor is missing! We’ve been robbed!
What?! I've been staring at it all night!
Who? Who could possibly make off with that massive anchor?!
I’ll tell you who. The man, the myth, the legend - The Sea Captain!
Anchors Away Pt. 2[]
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Sea Captain?! Why would HE want an anchor?
Uh, for his boat?
Anchors are for boats? I guess I should have done some research before taking this gig.
They say the Sea Captain was raised by a kraken, and sails a ship made from the bones of lost sailors.
Others say he’s a lonely former mailman who wears a captain’s hat as a conversation starter. Either way... spooky stuff!
Kid, you need to lay off the glue. Let's check out the surveillance tape.
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One minute the anchor is there, the next it’s gone! Impossible!
It’s the magic of the sea.
There’s no such thing as sea magic. Only land magic. Magic stops at the shore, idiot.
What do they teach you kids in school nowadays?
Well, I am NOT getting fired twice in the same week. Let’s talk to this sea captain!
Anchors Away Pt. 3[]
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Kid, hang back while I shake down the old man. And watch out -- once he knows we’re onto him, he may swallow the anchor to hide his crime.
It weighs twenty tons.
I once cornered a shoplifter who swallowed three eyewitnesses before I could react.
Your hardcore thieves are all first-rate swallowers.
All Objectives Started[]
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Sea Captain! Paid any visits to the anchor store lately?
Yarrr. I, too, be interested in the disappearances there.
Beware, Brodka. There’s deviltry afoot. Anchor Management be a cursed and wretched place.
Uh-huh. By the way, is it true you used to be a mailman?
Aye. Forty-three years I cruised the neighborhood of Elmwood Heights. ‘Tis a cursed and wretched place, too.
Any places NOT cursed and wretched, you figure?
Portland’s not TOO cursed and wretched. I been there one time. Good food, nice bookstores.
Anchors Away Pt. 4[]
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That salty dog as good as admitted he’s our man, but we need to catch him in the act.
You’re dealing with powers you can’t possibly understand, Mr. Brodka!
The only thing that scares me is unsolved crimes. Spiders aren’t great, and the dream where I’m skydiving but my parachute won’t open is pretty bad, too.
But mainly unsolved crimes.
*ack* He's back! Returned to the scene of the crime to curse us with his nautical necromancy!
Oh no he doesn't.Tail him!
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Five more anchors are missing!
Sea Captain! Tell me what you know! No more riddles!
I bet it never occurred to you to lick one of the anchors you guard, did it?
I must be slipping. Usually, licking the merchandise is the first step in any serious investigation.
*licks anchor* Hmm... tastes sweet. Is this... spun sugar?
Anchors Away Pt. 5[]
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Anchor Management been cutting corners, making their anchors not from steel, but from sugar.
And every morning, the sprinklers dissolve the sugar-anchors! Why didn’t I think of that?!
Probably because it’s a pretty dumb idea.
Thanks to this evil, the yachts and powerboats of a hundred retired doctors have been set adrift, dashed on the rocks.
Humanity... what a joke.
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I’m sorry I doubted you, Sea Captain.
It’s not yer fault, lad. I never would have believed humanity capable of such evil, if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes.
I no longer understand the land world It’s time to return to the sea, and my fish girlfriend.