Abe the Toy Soldier was a limited-time questline released on December 25, 2019. It was the main questline of Act 3 of the Abe's in Toyland 2019 Event, following the Act 2 quest A Foggy London Christmas.

Quests[edit | edit source]

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 1 Collect Toy Soldiers (x50)
Make Grampa Tell Another Wild Tale
-
4h
Cash100
Experience10
Auto
Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 2 Collect Toy Soldiers (x100)
Make Grampa Model for Whiz-Bang Toys
-
4h
Cash100
Experience10
Auto
Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 3 Collect Toy Soldiers (x100)
Make Grampa Pose for Reference Shots
-
4h
Cash100
Experience10
Auto
Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 4 Collect Toy Soldiers (x100)
Make Grampa Keep His Secret
-
4h
Cash100
Experience10
Auto
Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 5 Collect Toy Soldiers (x100)
Make Grampa Save America From Intrusive Surveillance
-
4h
Cash200
Experience20
Auto

Dialogue[edit | edit source]

Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 1[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Death Annoyed Icon.png Look, you need to hurry up these stories. You’re supposed to be chewing coffin dirt by dawn.
Grampa Serious Icon.png Don’t get your ghoul underpants in a ghost knot, I’m getting there.
Grampa Icon.png World War Two was over. I had an honorable discharge from the Army, and a dishonorable discharge from a skin condition I picked up in Paris.
Grampa Icon.png The economy was booming, and every veteran was dating a nurse he’d kissed on V-J day.
Grampa Serious Icon.png And yet America was threatened by internal Communist subversives from the USSR.
Grampa Serious Icon.png We were headed towards a Christmas nightmare!
Death Happy Icon.png I know all about Christmas nightmares.

End[edit | edit source]

No dialogue.

Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 2[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Grampa Icon.png So there I was in 1950, looking for a job where I could use the skills I learned in the Army.
Grampa Sad Icon.png But there wasn't much demand for potato peelers, despite my vast experience.
Grampa Happy Icon.png Then I got lucky!
Philip Hefflin Icon.png Hey there, soldier, I work for Whiz Bang toys.
Philip Hefflin Icon.png We’re going to make some Army Man toy soldiers, and I’d like to use you as the model.
Philip Hefflin Happy Icon.png We’ll pay you a penny for every thousand soldiers we sell.
Young Grampa Simpson Icon.png Lemme just do the math… aw, too hard. I assume I’ll be rich!

End[edit | edit source]

No dialogue.

Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 3[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Philip Hefflin Happy Icon.png Abe, you’re going to be a fantastic model for our Army Man toys.
Philip Hefflin Icon.png Now, take this rifle and imagine you’re pointing it at the enemy.
Young Grampa Simpson Icon.png My platoon lieutenant. Got it.
Philip Hefflin Annoyed Icon.png I mean, someone you actually killed.
Young Grampa Simpson Icon.png My platoon lieutenant. Got it.

End[edit | edit source]

No dialogue.

Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 4[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Philip Hefflin Happy Icon.png You did a fantastic job posing for those toy soldiers, Abe. You’ve made Whiz Bang Toys very happy.
Federal Agent Icon.png And you’ve done a great service to your country.
Young Grampa Simpson Surprised Icon.png For the first time ever! But how?
Federal Agent Icon.png I work for J. Edgar Hoover at the FBI. We’re going to use those toy soldiers to root out Communist infiltrators.
Federal Agent Icon.png Each one of them has a tiny radio transmitter inside. We’ll be able to hear everything that’s going on inside every home in America.
Federal Agent Icon.png As a patriotic American, can I count on you to keep quiet about this?
Young Grampa Simpson Icon.png Sir, it’s 1950. Which means I still trust the government.

End[edit | edit source]

No dialogue.

Abe the Toy Soldier Pt. 5[edit | edit source]

Start[edit | edit source]

Character Dialogue
Grampa Icon.png Well, I said I wouldn’t blab about the toys being designed to spy on ordinary Americans.
Grampa Startled Icon.png But it turned out my girlfriend at the time was spying on me for the CIA.
Grampa Icon.png Lots of spying in those days. Anyway, she told her boss, who didn’t like the FBI stickin’ their noses into his business.
Grampa Icon.png They confiscated and melted all the original Army Man soldiers. Whiz Bang had to make a new batch.
Grampa Serious Icon.png Which is why, instead of me, they look like Kirk Douglas.

End[edit | edit source]

No dialogue.

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