A Savage Thaw was a limited-time questline released on December 12, 2018. It was the main questline of Act 2 of the A Simpsons Christmas Special 2018 Event, progressing through it unlocked all of the event's personal prizes. It was preceded by a short intro quest A Savage Thaw Intro.
Quests[]
| Quest | Requirements | Time | Reward | Triggered By |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Savage Thaw Pt. 1 | Make Bart Practice His Action Puns Make Milhouse Do Paperwork Collect Snowballs (x100) |
4h 4h - |
 100  10
|
Auto |
| A Savage Thaw Pt. 2 | Make Bart Storm the Snow Bank Make Milhouse Try Not to Get Taken Hostage Collect Snowballs (x300) |
8h 8h - |
100 10
|
Auto |
| A Savage Thaw Pt. 3 | Make Bart Play Bad Cop Make Milhouse Play Timid Cop Make Ralph Spin in His Chair Till He Gets Sick Collect Snowballs (x300) |
4h 4h 4h - |
100 10
|
Auto |
| A Savage Thaw Pt. 4 | Make Bart Visit Moe's Make Homer Drink at Moe's Collect Snowballs (x300) |
8h 8h - |
100 10
|
Auto |
| A Savage Thaw Pt. 5 | Make Bart and Milhouse Drive the Snow Mobile Make Ralph Play Dress Up in the Evidence Closet Collect Snowballs (x300) |
12h 12h - |
100 10
|
Auto |
| A Savage Thaw Pt. 6 | Make Bart Storm the Truck Stop Diner Make Milhouse Try to Minimize the Damage |
8h 8h |
200 20
|
Auto |
Dialogue[]
A Savage Thaw Pt. 1[]
Start[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
Robbers are robbing a bank! Somebody call the police! |
|
Sounds like a job for a loose cannon and his gutless partner. |
|
I don’t know, Savage. Maybe we should sit this one out. |
|
|
The bad guys have snow shooters that sound like *pew pew*. |
|
“Snow shooters”. I like how harmless that sounds. |
|
|
Thought I’d throw you a bone there, Toots. Dad, when I say “snow shooters”, you just picture Uzis and headshots spraying red gore everywhere. |
|
I’m on it! |
End[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
All right Meeks, let's roll out. |
|
Have fun catching the bad guys! I’ll suspend you for taking the law into your own hands when you get back! |
A Savage Thaw Pt. 2[]
Start[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
Okay Meeks, what are we looking at, here? |
|
|
We got terrorists inside the bank, with an unknown number of hostages. The police negotiator is on his way, so sit tight-- |
|
Banzai charge! |
|
Wait! Don’t charge in until we have a plan! |
|
|
I don't make plans, I make results! Chaaarge! |
End[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
Oh no! It's rogue livewire Officer Savage! Let’s make like snow and flake! |
|
*kicks over a cabinet* Meeks, you let those charmingly snow-themed terrorists escape! |
|
Uh, I was a little busy rescuing the hostages. |
|
You’re a real hero. Did you even get a look at those sweet, innocent hostages you saved? |
|
|
Oh my God. They’re... they’re... |
|
|
They’re Christmas Carolers. The worst, most annoying people on Earth. And you let them live. |
|
Nooooooo! |
A Savage Thaw Pt. 3[]
Start[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
|
I wear my policeman’s uniform over my PJs so I don’t have to change into my PJs at night so bedtime is five minutes later! |
|
|
Uh, you wanted to see us, Chief? |
|
|
Hand in your badge, Savage! I’m mad at you for I-forget-why! |
|
|
Probably, I’m guessing, because we let the bad guys get away? |
|
|
... |
|
|
My PJs are itchy under my uniform. |
|
Let’s question the hostages, see what they can tell us about the terrorists. |
End[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
The terrorists are being led by a villain who calls himself “Deep Freeze”. |
|
Figures. The really dangerous ones always choose the most whimsical names. |
|
|
Remember when Silly McGilly shot up that mall? Peerless psycho. |
|
|
Not as bad as when Love-ums the King of Hugs killed and ate an entire preschool. |
|
You guys talking about Deep Freeze? Good guy. I met him in the bank holdup, but he let me go. |
|
Finally! The real hero of the story arrives! |
|
|
I was supposed to be his hostage, but he said I was too fat and dumb to take along. Said I smelled, too. And that I was dumb. |
|
*ANNOYED GRUNT* |
A Savage Thaw Pt. 4[]
Start[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
Can I ask you a few questions, Fat Smelly Dummy? |
|
Don’t respond to that, Story Homer. |
|
|
Fire away, Copper! |
|
Dammit! Have some self-respect, me! |
|
Did Deep Freeze reveal anything to you about his evil plan? |
|
|
He wouldn't stop talking about Christmas, or all the presents he was gonna buy with the stolen loot. |
|
|
Weird that a criminal would care so much about Christmas... |
|
I wish I could remember more about him. Of course, my brain works best when it’s black-out drunk. |
|
|
To Moe’s! |
End[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
|
That’s ten eggnogs you’ve had, sir. Are you remembering anything else about the bad guy? |
|
Nothin’ yet. One more eggnog oughta do it. Or per’aps a tasty eggnog will help! |
|
*heavy sigh* I think this is a dead end, this guy has no idea where Deep Freeze is. |
|
Deep Freeze? He's robbing the Snow Bank again right now. |
|
|
Why would he rob it again, when he knows it’s been cleaned out? |
|
It ain’t easy coming up with new buildings for this town every couple months. Can’t justify all that work unless you use them multiple times. |
|
|
We’d better take the Snow Mobile. |
A Savage Thaw Pt. 5[]
Start[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
|
Chief, we’re heading back to the Snow Bank. Deep Freeze is up to something. |
|
|
We’re not sure what, exactly. But it appears to be highly repetitive. |
|
|
Officers Rod and Todd are on site. They’re authorized to pray for Deep Freeze with extreme prejudice. |
|
|
Rod and Todd?! But they’re incompetent! |
|
|
“Incompetent”? What’s that? |
|
|
Hoo boy. |
End[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
Surrender, Deep Freeze! We’ve got you surrounded by the loving embrace of forgiveness! |
|
We’ve already turned one cheek. Don’t make us turn the other one! |
|
You don’t scare me, Coppers. |
|
|
Well maybe I do! |
|
|
Savage! Okay, how about a plea deal - I'll tell youse who’s really pulling the strings, and youse let me go. |
|
Youse’ll find the real kingpin at the Truck Stop Diner. |
|
|
Another new building, eh? All right. Let’s unlock it and see what’s what. |
A Savage Thaw Pt. 6[]
Start[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
|
I know what you’re gonna say, Savage, but I’d really love to do a quick perimeter check of the diner before we-- |
|
|
I’ve got a dumber idea. |
|
|
Don’t say “banzai charge”. Don’t say “banzai charge”... |
|
|
*sound of explosions* How about I blow the door with TNT, and only afterwards ask you if that’s a good idea? |
|
|
You know, I'm the one who has to fill out the paperwork when you blow stuff up! |
End[]
| Character | Dialogue |
|---|---|
|
|
Stop right there, we've got you cornered...Santa Claus? |
|
You bet your stockings it is! |
|
|
But why? You gone naughty on us, old man? |
|
I needed the cash! You think it’s CHEAP making toys for every child in the world? |
|
|
And if I occasionally want to enjoy a high-end wine, or add to my collection of fine timepieces, do you think that’s easy on a saint’s income? |
|
Well, I suppose my partner and I could look the other way... for a cut of the loot. |
|
Savage is a crooked cop?! What a twist! |
|
That’s cheating! To be satisfying, a twist has to be both well set up AND motivated by character. Otherwise it’s just cheap! |
|
Then why am I so completely satisfied and fulfilled as an audience member? Huh? Answer that! |
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