FANDOM


A New Wrinkle on Dating is a side questline released on January 9, 2019 for the Not Yet Spring Cleaning 2019 Event. It needs the character Alice Glick. It starts upon finishing the main event's questline Mystery of the Brown House.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 1 Make Ms. Glick Act Young 12h Cash100
XP10
Alice Glick
A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 2 Make Ms. Glick Try to Watch Music Videos 4h Cash100
XP10
Jasper
A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 3 Make Ms. Glick Have a Knitting Circle 8h Cash100
XP10
Alice Glick
A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 4 Make Ms. Glick Hand Out Mints 60m Cash100
XP10
Auto
A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 5 Make Ms. Glick Swipe Right on Dates 60m Cash200
XP20
Alice Glick

Dialogue Edit

A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 1 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Alice Glick Happy Icon Maybe I’ll give retirement home living a shot.
Old Jewish Man Happy Icon It’s pretty nice. Plenty of room to shuffle around, and you get three squares a day.
Old Jewish Man Annoyed Icon Although I prefer my squares rounded so I don’t cut my mouth.
Alice Glick Annoyed Icon At least I’ll be the most spry person here.
Gil Happy Icon Cha-cha-cha, this place is a dream! Even homier than the homeless center!
Alice Glick Angry Icon What’s that whippersnapper doing here?!
Alice Glick Angry Icon I’m supposed to be the ingenue, not him!

A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Jasper Icon My favorite part of this show is when it cuts to extremely loud commercials -- it’s the only thing I can hear.
Alice Glick Surprised Icon What is this lame show, dude? I want to watch music videos on MTV, man!
Jasper Spacey Icon MTV hasn’t played music videos since before I got my beard plugs.
Alice Glick Angry Icon Give me that remote -- I’ll find them!

A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 3 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Alice Glick Sad Icon Ah, who am I kidding, I’m just an old crone.
Alice Glick Sad Icon Try as I might, I’ll never be young.
Alice Glick Icon Guess I’ll just knit some socks. This is my life now.
Lisa Surprised Icon Whoa, are you crocheting?
Alice Glick Sad Icon Go ahead, laugh at me. I deserve it for getting old.
Lisa Happy Icon No, it’s cool! I saw it on Pinterest!
Alice Glick Happy Icon Really? A young person like you thinks I’m cool?
Lisa Embarrassed Icon Well, I’m sort of an un-cool young person--
Alice Glick Happy Icon A young person thinks I’m cool!

A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 4 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Gil Happy Icon Man, I was killing it in today’s Senior Water Aerobics class!
Gil Embarrassed Icon Unfortunately, the slippery floor was killing it too. R.I.P. Mrs. Henderson.
Alice Glick Icon Pff, water aerobics? Give me a break.
Gil Annoyed Icon You think you can out-youth me?
Alice Glick Icon It’s called being a hipster. You do all the things old people do -- knit, use typewriters, listen to records -- but you do it "ironically".
Alice Glick Icon Here, have some gross old-timey candy... ironically.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Happy Icon Wow, since when did the nursing home get so cool?
Jasper Spacey Icon Now my gross old man beard is a hipster beard.
Old Jewish Man Happy Icon I found an old film camera in my closet, so I’m super into photography now!
Alice Glick Happy Icon This place is really hopping. I feel so young again!
Alice Glick Happy Icon Now I need to find a boyfriend...

A New Wrinkle on Dating Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Alice Glick Sad Icon I thought with my newfound youth, dating would be much easier.
Alice Glick Sad Icon But it’s so time consuming going out and trying to get to know people to see if I like their personality.
Shauna Icon Personality? Dating nowadays is about making a snap judgement about someone after two seconds of looking at them.
Alice Glick Sad Icon Are you talking about dating apps? No one in here has a cellphone, so I can’t "swipe right” on them.
Shauna Icon Most of them are in wheelchairs though. If you like the way they look, swipe their wheelchair to the right.
Alice Glick Surprised Icon And if I don’t, swipe it to the left and never think of them again!

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Alice Glick Sad Icon Well, I instantly judged every guy in the nursing home, and I didn’t get to know any of them.
Alice Glick Happy Icon I’m still alone, but I feel superior to everyone I rejected.
Alice Glick Happy Icon Modern dating is great!
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.